Qualified Good News Part Two

Trying to take the long view - walking on Roman tiles near the Sea of Galilee

It has been quite awhile since I've managed to write anything.  I've sat down dozens of times to chronicle what has been going on and I'm not happy with what I've written.  I realize that this may cause the people that care about me to assume the worst while the opposite is in fact the case.

I had my first post-radiation MRI at the beginning of the month.  It was almost two years to the day from my diagnosis in Australia.  I was diligently prepared by both my radiation and neuro-oncologist not to expect any improvement.  I was warned that often tumors appear worse on the first post-treatment scan and it can take two or three months before positive signs appear.  So despite the fact that I was feeling better than I had been in a long time, I went into the appointment with muted expectations.
I was honestly shocked when the scan showed the first significant improvement since I was diagnosed even though I could feel the change in my body.  The ventricle that had been so obviously compressed by the tumor mass appeared almost normal.  All the contours of a healthy brain were back as the pressure from the tumor mass had been reduced.  I soldiered through the treatment that I dreaded the most and it helped.  Still, when you look at my scan, there is a lot of tumor tissue but such a clear change is encouraging and uplifting.
I felt excited, energized, and fortunate.  Steph and I immediately launched into planning how to rebuild our "old" lives.  We talked about our plans non-stop.  I took a trip to Washington to explore how to go about re-entering the State Department.  I was happy to be back in D.C. and seeing friends (too few I'm afraid in such a compressed time) and planning how this might work.  After two days, I started to feel exhausted.  It was as if the long discussed toll of six-weeks of radiation caught up with me in a day.  I felt utterly tapped out.  I realized that this is a time to appreciate and savor but foremost, it is a time for rest, patience, and healing.