Change is good, right?

Walt's backseat perspective heading home

Today was the day for my three month MRI and visit with my doctor.  It's not good news.  There is new growth and my tumor has changed.  This is what brain tumors do - they don't stay stagnant for very long.  The grow, change, evolve, mutate.  It is hard to know what exactly has happened but we will be facing some hard decisions soon.

I did feel in my gut that something was off but I tried to push it aside since I had experienced seizures and a worsening of symptoms before only to go in for my MRI and and find things unchanged.  I have considered this day many times but I suppose one is never fully prepared to hear the tumor is growing and changing.
What to do now?  The UCSF tumor board meets tomorrow and after all of the doctors have weighed in, I will speak to my doctor and talk about our options.  More surgery is back on the table, to both biopsy the new tumor and find out if it is a mutation or if it is the same cancer simply growing.  The doctor even floated the possibility of a "debulking" procedure to reduce the size of the largest mass and buy me some more time.  I didn't think this was even possible but it may be.
Of course, the unwanted visitor lurking in the corner - Whole Brain Radiation - is back in the mix.  It is too early to say what will be feasible until we hear the opinion of the tumor board.  More aggressive treatment might be an option after this all shakes out.  (Can I have my well fought draw back?)
Too soon to speculate about all of this but the unfortunate fact is the options are few.
All in all, a pretty brutal day.  I'm trying to keep my thoughts and feelings from running off ahead of me and just deal with the choices of the here and now.  Change is inevitable so we are trying to prepare ourselves for that.
The news is bad.  We'll know more tomorrow.  Send some good vibes our way if you have some to spare.